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Hope Floats

MC the Weirdo has decided that bars of soap are the Best Toys Ever. When told she can choose one toy for the car, she chooses soap. She takes soap to bed with her. When she watches television (which is very rare. so very very rare.), she holds a bar of soap under her nose.

Our house doesn't stink. Stop it.

Yesterday I took her to Bath and Body Works, because I choose to support her soap addiction.

Me: MC, do you know where we are?

MC: No.

Me: We're at Disney World. It's the happiest celebration on Earth.

MC: Soap!

The girl went nuts. She ran around the store smelling Every Single Bar of Soap before she chose Full of Hope: Coconut Milk and Vanilla.

(Me? I went with Eucalyptus Spearmint. You know, to help me relax. Sometimes I just need to relax.)

BaBW Employee: Can I help you find anything?

Me: We're just browsing. Meredith loves soap.

BaBWE: I can tell. I think she has smelled everything in the store.

Me: It's funny. She won't go anywhere without a bar of soap.

BaBWE: You could talk to her doctor about that if you want, but it's probably just a phase.

Me: I think you just saved me a co-pay.

BaBWE: What?

Me: Nothing.

BaBWE: If you like the Eucalyptus Spearmint, you might be interested in our spa line. The bar soaps will actually leave a tingle on your skin.

Me: I breastfeed at least fifteen times a day.

BaBWE: What?

Me: Nothing.

Me: Hey, MC, did you have fun at Disney World today?

MC: Yes!

Me: You're a very lucky little girl.


Posted by: fluidpudding on Sunday, September 11, 2005 , 38 comments
Submitted by alisha at 9/11/2005 12:21:43 PM
    This is the funniest post ever. My 2 year old is a day younger than yours and can be quite nuerotic too.
Submitted by mortimer's mom at 9/11/2005 1:06:03 PM
    soap... why can't it be that easy for me. She won't go anywhere without her blanky, her blue dog and her monkey.... we now have to put both animals IN the blanket to make the bundle easier to carry. I think I'm gonna put a stick in hit like Huck Finn!
    Soap... that would fit in a pocket!
Submitted by Kristina at 9/11/2005 1:21:20 PM
    That is hillarious. I am 26, and I have a strong addiction to soap too! Or maybe I just like to be clean.. hmmm.. Anyways, not to sound stalkerish or anything, but I found your blog about a week ago and have read the entire thing. I just love it. You kept me laughing for hours!

Submitted by RazDreams at 9/11/2005 2:11:22 PM
    teeheehee! she's so cute. i love your stories about her. makes me smile. :)
Submitted by Jenniffer at 9/11/2005 2:17:23 PM
    If I could buy their soap online, I would be in so much trouble.
Submitted by missbanshee at 9/11/2005 2:33:20 PM
    Hilarious! I love the picture, it's like she's meditating on how much she loves soap. "I looooooove youuuu,Soooooooooopy Soap...You are the beeeeeeeestest friend eveeeeeeeeer.."

    Could be worse, though. She could be dragging something ELSE around...Something like PIG CANDY?!?!??!?
Submitted by mrtl at 9/11/2005 4:11:12 PM
    How funny! You could even carve figures out of the soap.
Submitted by Kimmie at 9/11/2005 4:52:13 PM
    My son was 3 and he made a freind out of a pancake. Yes, I made pancakes (little ones for my boys) and the oldest one, then 5,picked one up and said it looked like a person, so my Mason, agreed and called it "Jimmy". Jimmy went everywhere for a week. In his pocket, to bed with him, beside him on the couch and watched TV. Well, by the end of that week, Jimmy had seen better days.....lol. I couldn't figure out what to do with him, so I placed him secretly in the garbage and told the kids the dog ate him. Bad dog, they were mad at her for days! He's 12, and once in a while he jokes around and calls stuff Jimmy. If only they had ebay then, I'd have made a fortune selling "jimmy".......he did look a little like Elvis.......lol
Submitted by jenl at 9/11/2005 7:18:45 PM
    OMG, that is classic! And with photographic evidence to boot~

    gawd, I love that kid.
Submitted by dragonlady474 at 9/11/2005 7:23:43 PM
    OMG..I thought you were teasing about the soap until I saw the picture lolol. It could be worse, when my daughter was that age she thought it was funny to poop in strange places.
Submitted by csg at 9/11/2005 7:32:03 PM
    I love Eucalyptus Spearmint!! I have lotion and shower gel. It's fabulous. Might as well get the munchkin started on the good stuff early!
Submitted by Annie at 9/11/2005 7:34:46 PM
    That is, hands down, the best story I have heard in a very long time.

    SOAP!
Submitted by Tammy at 9/11/2005 8:54:20 PM
    That does seem odd, but at least it's a GOOD thing to love. She could have decided to carry around something not so useful!
Submitted by sherry at 9/11/2005 9:33:37 PM
    That is possibly the cutest story I have heard in ages.
Submitted by Sarcastic Journalist at 9/11/2005 9:46:04 PM
    That's going to be one of those good stories to laugh at when she's older.
Submitted by Dillygirl at 9/11/2005 9:58:50 PM
    Eucalyptus Spearmint... excellent choice. I love the body spray stuff. So refreshing!

    And hey, you couldn't ask for a cleaner childhood obsession than soap. As long as she doesn't want to eat it. Or dress it in doll clothes.

    :)
Submitted by Redheadeditor at 9/11/2005 10:34:03 PM
    Why doesn't anyone get your humor? It's a sad sad world. I love that you have MC believing BaBW is DisneyWorld. That will save you a small fortune if you can keep us the supterfuge.
Submitted by Redheadeditor at 9/11/2005 10:34:21 PM
    Why doesn't anyone get your humor? It's a sad sad world. I love that you have MC believing BaBW is DisneyWorld. That will save you a small fortune if you can keep up the supterfuge.
Submitted by Carole at 9/11/2005 11:03:27 PM
    you know, soap is just a stepping stone...it all seems so innocent, but one day she'll discover shampoo, and then that will lead to the more hard core stuff like body splash and adorable little sachets...as she gets older you start finding her secret stashes in her backpack and under her bed, then one day you will discover her all strung out on the floor surrounded by empty bottles of purfume and cans of Glade airfreshener
Submitted by kristin at 9/12/2005 12:09:22 AM
    You know, my shrink's daughter is mc's age and she takes soap with her everywhere, too. she was telling me how one day her dh took the little one to school instead of her, and he forgot to take the soap away from her before they went in, and the daycare reamed out mom for letting her bring soap. ahahahahahaha. shrink? did i say shrink? i just mean that special friend i pay to listen to me bitch about my husband.
Submitted by Carroll at 9/12/2005 12:20:11 AM
    Too funny! But, Angie...you know you're just trolling for trolls again with this one, don't you? Surely it will be picked up by those rabid folks down at the Soap Protection Society*. I mean, you are allowing, if not actually ENCOURAGING, her to take that bar out of it's element and into a world for which it was not made. Sniffing soap, completely apart from any water? Soap abuse if ever I heard it!!

    *Motto: "SOS" (Save Our Soap!)
Submitted by stacie at 9/12/2005 7:42:49 AM
    I can't stand it! You, my friend, are a riot! Soap, as a toy. LOL I must add that my 4 yr old son likes to smell his hands after washing them with B&B soap. Nothing but the best for our little ones, eh?
Submitted by Jenny at 9/12/2005 9:07:20 AM
    That is so great! The "You are the luckiest girl" line made me pee a little.

    Hah!
Submitted by Guido at 9/12/2005 12:27:13 PM

    This reminded me of when Steve's (of The Sneeze) son had a thing for cabbage.

    http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/000011.php
Submitted by Guido at 9/12/2005 12:27:24 PM

    This reminded me of when Steve's (of The Sneeze) son had a thing for cabbage.

    http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/000011.php
Submitted by jen from ohio at 9/12/2005 1:55:22 PM
    i just got back from a tip to ashville nc and i had the best thing ever in the whole world...buttermilk pie.

    i cried a little.

    so. effing. good.
Submitted by crystal at 9/12/2005 2:06:07 PM
    at least she smells good. my son won't go anywhere without a stick from the backyard. i'd much rather take the soap. although i'm sure he'd only want to eat it.
Submitted by Renee at 9/12/2005 8:48:31 PM
    The way you talked to that employee was rude! Watch out or the wolves will come back for you - haha!

    Love the soap story - MC looks like StinkyBaby in the pic, without the soap of course. :)
Submitted by Kma at 9/12/2005 10:45:56 PM
    Hilarious picture! I love the binky/soap combo.
Submitted by Meredith at 9/13/2005 5:52:00 AM
    Good laughs. Glad you're still filling us up with laughs. A while back you said you might stop blogging and now you've got me worried. Each and every time I worry.

    Also I think I remember you were a Ben Folds fan. He does a Dr. Dre cover that I recommend. Bitches ain't shit. Perhaps you're in the know. I'm to faraway to know much these days. Off I go.
Submitted by mike at 9/13/2005 9:03:04 AM
    let me point out - for the record - that this post paints a service worker in a very favorable light - where are the applause from that crew....

    fluidpudding: fair and balanced...
Submitted by madness at 9/13/2005 11:23:05 AM
    This story is really too gd cute . . .makes me want to smell some soap, see what I'm missing. I know she knows something I don't.

    The My Friend the Pancake and My Friend the Cabbage stories though . . .set my inner weirdness aglow. Makes me realize I CAN have friends. The wisdom of children never ceases to astound me.
Submitted by halloweenlover at 9/13/2005 3:31:52 PM
    I love the picture! But this could become a very expensive habit! $5 soap? You should start maybe at Costco and buy irish spring, that way you can keep her soap habit and have her smelling lovely but cheaply. We are all about the cheap around here. Coconut milk and vanilla, though, yummmmm.
Submitted by karenth at 9/13/2005 9:13:52 PM
    JUST this moment noticed the beautiful photo of Meredith! Light just right, hair so casually perfect, shade of blue reflecting a thought on her little face. What a lucky girl to have shots like that to look at when she grows up!
Submitted by dusty at 9/13/2005 9:18:30 PM
    What a cute story!! and pics to back it up..you got off easy methinks..soap..it could of been something painfully disgusting..like my son's thing for a pillow case when he was young..we wont go there..it still makes me cry
Submitted by shannon at 9/14/2005 3:05:53 PM
    Hmm, seems like you have your very own budding obsessive compulsive. Before you know it she'll be wanting to microwave bottled water to use in the shower. JK, that's really quite cute.
Submitted by Gwynne at 9/15/2005 12:34:49 PM
    All of the above, and...that post title is absolutely precious!
Submitted by Surcie at 9/17/2005 2:26:49 PM
    I wonder how common these little fixations are. My son is the same way about vacuum cleaners. He just can't carry them around under his nose.
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